live.

emoional im calm. thoughtful...wintery. but yearning. loveing people. more and more. the less i look upon my own issues.
my dreams for next year are to live and work in jerusalem. hike and go on adventures. paint and journal and fall in love. dance and run as fast as i can and jump into blue waters. find a meadow and lay there. discover new sounds and skip across the streets. explore a very big city and sell some art. read and think and sow new clothes. stargaze and splatter paint around. weep on someones shoulder and get to know a very old person. i dream of hugging you and laughing until tears come.
i want to live.

everyday beauty.

 

since i´ve been back from sunny spring-time in Australia i have been discovering so much beauty in everyday life here in autumn eastern Germany. i love life here. i really do.

 

freedom is here

The last year has been not always easy.
i found myself questioning  alot... life, passions, and dreams.
university life shook me alot at first, i found myself wheeping on the floor may times.
it was not only the pressure but many other things breaking through my calloused heart.
now i believe i have arrived in a place, victory i havn´t know in so many years.
and it feels like i´m stepping into new land, can hardly believe it´s true.
One thing i know is this big thing following me all these past years has broke of with one huge very painful wave of all the emotions i have tried to compensate with other comforters in the last week i was in Sydney with my sister.
It was unforgettable, way too intense. But i was vividly reminded of Gods furiouse love when he cleaned his holy temple out. and now...why have i ignored so long that my body is his holy temple? i am responsible but don´t have to hold onto controll with all i have, for i have nothing without God.
It´s time be real. and most of all free.
the miracle of this season might seem silly but for me actually its a sign of nothing less but victory.
i enjoyed cake with friends last saturday.enjoyed.
 

so this morning i went out for a run and listened to sufjan stevens seven swans...i ran by a field of wild flowers a calm river and then i looked up and saw seven swans fly across the morning sky i felt like i was in a musik video ahha loved that moment. god actually spoke to me. like he was underlining the lyrics

We didn't sleep too late.
There was a fire in the yard.
All of the tress were in light.
They had no faces to show.
I saw a sign in the sky:
Seven swans, seven swans, seven swans.
I heard a voice in my mind:
I will try, I will try, I will try.
I will try, I will try, I will try.

We saw the dragon move down.
My father burned into coal.
My mother saw it from far.
She took her purse to the bed.
I saw a sign in the sky:
Seven horns, seven horns, seven horns.
I heard a voice in my mind:
I am Lord, I am Lord, I am Lord.
He said: I am Lord, I am Lord, I am Lord.
He said: I am Lord, I am Lord, I am Lord.

He will take you. If you run,
He will chase you.
He will take you. If you run,
He will chase you
'cause He is the Lord.

'Cause He is the Lord...
Seven swans, seven swans, seven swans,
seven swans, seven swans...


wow soo powerful with those seven swnas in the sky it made it soo real what he was singing..God is so amazing he know how to touch us..chase us...mmhh

"Today may there be peace within. May you trust that you are exactly where you are meant to be. May you not forget the infinite possibilities that are born of faith in yourself and others. May you use the gifts that you have received, and pass on the love that has been given to you. May you be content with yourself just the way you are. Let this knowledge settle into your bones, and allow your soul the freedom to sing, dance, praise and love. It is there for each and every one of us."

new things.

you can look at my newest artworks. also for sale. feel free to contact me if you are interested.
www.the4keys.weebly.com

thoughts.

 those moments that move you...and you can´t even name what it is...you just grasp it. i love phopraphy of broken old things, or withered flowers, left overs all those awekward things.what fills me with awe? nature. Early in the morning. dew. sunrise. forest. creek. birds. fields. and in it all Gods presence.i do believe in God, i love him and am drawing closer to his heart every day i wake.
oh and snow FALLING on a dark winter night does make a beautiful melody. i don´t know i anyone would normally notice. good not to be normal..
 

eastern germany.time traveling.

holy land

Following His voice to the promise land. i wouldn´t have thought this will ecome reality so soon in my life.
It was spontaneouse but long dreamt of and thus i knew it is time to life and not to continue waiting.
And here it is. Life in it´s fullest.
Te moment the plane touched the holy land my eyes filled with tears and he butterflies dance in my chest. Whispering "home" not really knowing why, i breathed the first breath of the mild sping air outside the Ben-Gurion Airport.
The time until our guest family picked us up we daced between citrus trees, olive trees and the top of an open parkinglot under the starry sky, laughing.
The family is so nice and it is so from God tht everything fit so well together and now we´ll see where thes coming weeks will lead us.
It will be an adventure. Every day.
The hikey through Galilee are breathtkingly beautyful. Mountains of countless rich full green trees white rocks and bright colorful flowes between olive trees and blossoming almond trees.
The birds sing more here, everything seems so rich sucht laing in the gras here is better and more satisfying that any meal and i just want to live of it.
The experience of taking care od three small childen is new for me and troublesome at times. I´m growing into it though realizing that i have to be stern and strikt, strong willed but loving. And sure of who i am and the authority i carry. It´such an important lesson since it´s the same priciples in the spiritual i´m learning. Not to give up, knowing my identity as an embassador of someone greater, being given the authority to carry out through both strength and love.
So every day so far has been an unexchangable rich experience and i´m lerning so much.
More to come....

farewell once again.

Home is behind, the world ahead,
And there are many paths to tread
Through shadow to the edge of night,
Until the stars are all alight.
Mist and shadow, cloud and shade,
All shall fade! All shall fade!

Upon the hearth the fire is red,
Beneath the roof there is a bed;
But not yet weary are our feet,
Still round the corner we may meet
A sudden tree or standing stone.
That none have seen but we alone
Tree and flower and leaf and grass,
Let them pass! Let them pass!
Hill and water under sky,
Pass them by! Pass them by!

Still round the corner there may wait
A new road or a secret gate,
And though we pass them by today,
Tomorrow we may come this way
And take the hidden paths that run
Towards the Moon or to the Sun.
Apple, thorn, and nut and sloe,
Let them go! Let them go!
Sand and stone and pool and dell,
Fare you well! Fare you well!

Home is behind, the world ahead,
And there are many paths to tread
Through shadow to the edge of night,
Until the stars are all alight.
Mist and shadow, cloud and shade,
All shall fade! All shall fade!